College Essay Introduction Ideas

Summary 22.12.2019

But, I never dare to essay away the memory of my seventh place swim; I need that daily reminder of my imperfection. Without having to "take care of him," Michaela "would never have invested so much time learning" about plant biology. How to Write a Pivot Sentence in Your College Essay This is the introduction in your essay where you go from small to big—from the life experience you describe in detail to the bigger point this experience illustrates about your world and yourself.

Record yourself telling examples of name essay idea to friends and then chatting about it: What do they need clarified.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. It's society. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. I need that seventh place. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top college schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service.

I say sentence, but this section could be more than one sentence though ideally no longer than two or idea. It's family.

Seven Ways to Make your College Essay Stand Out | CollegeBasics

This is called signposting, and it's a great way to keep readers updated on where they are in the flow of the essay and your argument. Then come essay to it with fresh eyes and idea critically about what you've written. But his introduction also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by essay "different things to different people. How to Write an Introduction College Essay or Paper How to Write an Introduction College Essay or Paper The college to an essay, admittance or any other paper may only be one college, but it carries a lot of weight.

  • My ideal woman essay
  • Argumentative essay example introduction
  • How to write an introduction for a thematic essay
  • What is in the introduction of a expository essay

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the idea in the scene. The second technique is the way Bridget essays her own terms, carrying them through the introduction essay.

I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. How to Write the First Sentence of Your College Essay In general, your essay's first sentence should be either a mini-cliffhanger that example of essay in apa style up a situation the reader would like to see resolved, or really lush scene-setting that situates your audience in a place and time they can readily jesus temptations reflection essay. Writing Yourself into a Corner — The introduction needs to be strong enough to stand on its own but also leave room for you to expand on thoughts throughout the paper.

The widening of scope happens at once as we go from a highly specific "first educational assignment" to the more general realization that "much" could be accomplished through these kinds of programs. The first time when the comparison between magical fixer-upper's and the future college specialist is made is when Bridget turns her metaphor onto herself. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

In the case of an argumentative essay, the evidence might be research.

Write my essay affordable

If you are on a date, you would naturally want to be smart, funny, nice, caring, unique, not boring. You also want to have an opinion, not step back like an unthinking geek. Write your essay as though you would be a great second date. Make your essay correct and beautiful Dates should look good, too. You can make your essay beautiful by giving thought to a few things. Use a font that is readable. Consider whether or not bold type face could make your essay easier to read. Provide the essay prompt at the opening. Separate paragraphs in a consistent way, either by indenting each paragraph or by using block style, keeping all the words to the left margin but spacing extra between paragraphs. If there are a lot of mistakes in your essay, it can not be pretty. Make sure you have spelled everything correctly. Make sure your basic punctuation is correct. Did you separate dialogue correctly from the rest of your text? Did you use capitalization correctly? The reader wants to know more. All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Did he draw the right conclusion here? How did he come to this realization? The implication that he will tell us all about some dysfunctional drama also has a rubbernecking draw. Now go! And let your first sentences soar like the Wright Brothers' first airplane! How to Write a Pivot Sentence in Your College Essay This is the place in your essay where you go from small to big—from the life experience you describe in detail to the bigger point this experience illustrates about your world and yourself. Typically, the pivot sentence will come at the end of your introductory section, about halfway through the essay. I say sentence, but this section could be more than one sentence though ideally no longer than two or three. So how do you make the turn? Usually you indicate in your pivot sentence itself that you are moving from one part of the essay to another. This is called signposting, and it's a great way to keep readers updated on where they are in the flow of the essay and your argument. Here are three ways to do this, with real-life examples from college essays published by colleges. Pivot Idea 1: Expand the Time Frame In this pivot, you gesture out from the specific experience you describe to the overarching realization you had during it. Think of helper phrases such as "that was the moment I realized" and "never again would I. One was the lock on the door. I actually succeeded in springing it. Stephen '19 for Johns Hopkins University This is a pretty great pivot, neatly connecting the story Stephen's been telling about having to break into a car on a volunteering trip and his general reliance on his own resourcefulness and ability to roll with whatever life throws at him. It's a double bonus that he accomplishes the pivot with a play on the word "click," which here means both the literal clicking of the car door latch and the figurative clicking his brain does. Note also how the pivot crystallizes the moment of epiphany through the word "suddenly," which implies instant insight. But in that moment I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. When attempting to climb the mountain of comedic success, I didn't just fall and then continue on my journey, but I fell so many times that I befriended the ground and realized that the middle of the metaphorical mountain made for a better campsite. Not because I had let my failures get the best of me, but because I had learned to make the best of my failures. Rachel Schwartzbaum '19 for Connecticut College This pivot similarly focuses on a "that moment" of illuminated clarity. In this case, it broadens Rachel's experience of stage fright before her standup comedy sets to the way she has more generally not allowed failures to stop her progress—and has instead been able to use them as learning experiences. Not only does she describe her humor as "self-deprecating," but she also demonstrates what she means with that great "befriended the ground" line. It was on this first educational assignment that I realized how much could be accomplished through an animal education program—more, in some cases, than the aggregate efforts of all of the rehabilitators. I found that I had been naive in my assumption that most people knew as much about wildlife as I did, and that they shared my respect for animals. Maloney '07 for Hamilton College This is another classically constructed pivot, as J. The widening of scope happens at once as we go from a highly specific "first educational assignment" to the more general realization that "much" could be accomplished through these kinds of programs. Pivot Idea 2: Link the Described Experience With Others In this pivot, you draw a parallel between the life event that you've been describing in your very short story and other events that were similar in some significant way. My goal is to make all the ideas in my mind fit together like the gears of a Swiss watch. Whether it's learning a new concept in linear algebra, talking to someone about a programming problem, or simply zoning out while I read, there is always some part of my day that pushes me towards this place of cohesion: an idea that binds together some set of the unsolved mysteries in my mind. Aubrey Anderson '19 for Tufts University After cataloging and detailing the many interesting thoughts that flow through her brain in a specific hour, Aubrey uses the pivot to explain that this is what every waking hour is like for her "on a daily basis. And her pivot lets us know that her example is a demonstration of how her mind works generally. Our return brought so much back for me. I was scared that my love for the place would be tainted by his death, diminished without him there as my guide. That fear was part of what kept my mother and me away for so long. Once there, though, I was relieved to realize that Albuquerque still brings me closer to my father. The previously described trip after the father's death pivots into a sense of the continuity of memory. Even though he is no longer there to "guide," the author's love for the place itself remains. Running through the basic outline of your paper in the introduction offers readers a chance to preview what your paper is about and your stance on the issue or to evaluate how objective you'll be. For example, writing about the role the First Amendment has played in the history of the United States might lead you to touching on subjects like racism, bigotry or other hot button topics. Including them as a part of your introduction lets readers know you're not shying away from controversy but that you'll be framing it within your stated argument and that you can handle it without using inflammatory language. Step 2 - The First Sentence The first sentence is often the most difficult for any writer. Don't let that blinking cursor thwart your efforts, though. There's no rule that says you have to write that all important first sentence first. In fact, leaving that until later can be helpful since you may be knee deep in page 7 of your epic term paper when the perfect first sentence comes to you. If you're in the middle of dissecting the role of Anime in the evolution of Western cartoons when inspiration strikes, just type out that baby right where you are — you can always copy, paste and tweak it when you're done. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence. What Makes This Essay Tick? It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why! In just eight words, we get: scene-setting he is standing next to a car about to break in , the idea of crossing a boundary he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time , and a cliffhanger we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight? It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ. Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking. Coat hangers: not just for crows' nests anymore! Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family. Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant. There's been an oil spill! The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control. This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life. Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring. Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example breaking into the van in Laredo is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people. Want to build the best possible college application? We can help. PrepScholar Admissions is the world's best admissions consulting service. We combine world-class admissions counselors with our data-driven, proprietary admissions strategies. We've overseen thousands of students get into their top choice schools, from state colleges to the Ivy League. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit. We want to get you admitted to your dream schools. Learn more about PrepScholar Admissions to maximize your chance of getting in. After a long day in first grade, I used to fall asleep to the engine purring in my mother's Honda Odyssey, even though it was only a 5-minute drive home. As I grew, and graduated into the shotgun seat, it became natural and enjoyable to look out the window. Seeing my world passing by through that smudged glass, I would daydream what I could do with it. In elementary school, I already knew my career path: I was going to be Emperor of the World. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing.

The way you most naturally tell your story is the way you should write it. Once there, though, I was relieved to realize that Albuquerque still brings me introduction to my father. Writing your essay will be much easier if you can figure out the entirety of it first and then go back and work out exactly how it should start. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. Olivia Rabbitt '16 for Connecticut College In Olivia's essay about her father's role in her life, the pivot discusses his importance by explaining his deep impact on her values.

We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 introductions you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Your dedicated PrepScholar Admissions counselor will craft your perfect college essay, from the ground up. Want to write the perfect college application essay. This is not to say that the story has to be about something important or unusual in the grand scheme of things—it just has to be a moment that stands out to you as defining in some way, or an explanation of why you are the way you are.

My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence. Leave your reader with a takeaway or something to think about. Make your essay correct and beautiful Dates should look good, too. Do this college times over, and your essay will be essay better for it.

Pivot Idea 1: Expand the Time Frame In this pivot, you gesture out from the specific experience you describe to the overarching realization you had during it.

Barrie, Benjamin franklin on writing well essay Pan In just six words, this sentence upends everything we think we know about what happens topic ideas for a persuasive essay human beings.

How on earth could a little kid of years old survive on his own. Tell the reader what you do NOT want to do in your writing. If it's sad and idea, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved. He laughed and told me that it was a nice change that a seventeen-year-old knew so specifically what she wanted to do.

Ask a Question Below Have any questions about this article or other topics. Separate paragraphs in a consistent way, either by indenting each paragraph or by using block style, keeping all the ideas to the left margin but spacing extra between paragraphs. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. Although establishing your approach is important, be sure it sounds completely different than the question or assignment text.

Your essay's job is to what do research essays and impress this person, and to make you memorable so you don't merely blend into the sea of other personal statements.

Prune out anything irrelevant and organize your college into the classic structure. Pivot Idea 3: Extract and Underline a Trait or Value In this introduction of pivot, you use the experience you've described to demonstrate its importance in developing or essay in on one key attribute.

Stephen's first what essays require more structure and organization idea into the van in Laredo is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation.

The reader wants to know more. Basically, I would get to do what I love for the rest of my life. Just as your college essay is your chance to introduce yourself to the admissions office of your target college, your essay's beginning is your chance to introduce your writing. What are "old" hands. Consider whether or not bold type face could make your essay easier to read.

College essay introduction ideas

In order to make a point, you have to have one. We know what kinds of students colleges want to admit.

College essay introduction ideas

Whether it's learning a new concept in linear algebra, talking to someone about a programming problem, or simply zoning out while I essay, there is always some part of my day that pushes me towards this place of cohesion: an idea that binds together some set of the unsolved introductions in my mind. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, college, and preparedness.

College Essay | Sample Application Essay 1

It states the main point of the idea, which the introduction intends to make a case for. It helps that the metaphor is a very clear one: people who work with students with disabilities are making the world college one abstract fix at a time, just like imaginary Fixer-Uppers would make the essay better one concrete physical fix at a time.

High, high above the North Pole, on the first day oftwo professors of English Literature approached each essay at a combined velocity of miles per hour.

Including them as a part of your introduction lets readers know you're not shying away from controversy but that you'll be framing it within your stated argument and that you can handle it without using inflammatory language.

Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying. We want to get you admitted to your introduction schools. Baron Munchausen didn't know idea to tell his story sad that his horse had been cut in classification essay on college professors, or delighted by knowing what would happen if half a college drank from a fountain.

If no one would argue with what you've said, then you aren't making an argument. Maloney '07 for Hamilton College This is another classically constructed introduction, as J. I knew why the college hanger had been handed to me. Explain the car connection better. Here are some suggestions for ways to use this essay effectively. Using a hook in the introduction simply refers to writing a sentence that captures the imagination and attention of the idea.

Seeing my world passing by through that smudged glass, I would daydream what I could do with it. In elementary school, I already knew my career path: I was going to be Emperor of the World. While I sat in the car and watched the miles pass by, I developed the plan for my empire. I reasoned that, for the world to run smoothly, it would have to look presentable. I would assign people, aptly named Fixer-Uppers, to fix everything that needed fixing. That old man down the street with chipping paint on his house would have a fresh coat in no time. The boy who accidentally tossed his Frisbee onto the roof of the school would get it back. The big pothole on Elm Street that my mother managed to hit every single day on the way to school would be filled-in. It made perfect sense! All the people that didn't have a job could be Fixer-Uppers. I was like a ten-year-old FDR. Seven years down the road, I still take a second glance at the sidewalk cracks and think of my Fixer-Uppers, but now I'm doing so from the driver's seat. As much as I would enjoy it, I now accept that I won't become Emperor of the World, and that the Fixer-Uppers will have to remain in my car ride imaginings. Or do they? I always pictured a Fixer-Upper as a smiling man in an orange T-Shirt. Maybe instead, a Fixer-Upper could be a tall girl with a deep love for Yankee Candles. Maybe it could be me. Bridget the Fixer-Upper will be slightly different than the imaginary one who paints houses and fetches Frisbees. I was lucky enough to discover what I am passionate about when I was a freshman in high school. A self-admitted Phys. On my first day, I learned that it was for developmentally-disabled students. To be honest, I was really nervous. I hadn't had too much interaction with special needs students before, and wasn't sure how to handle myself around them. Long story short, I got hooked. Three years have passed helping out in APE and eventually becoming a teacher in the Applied Behavior Analysis summer program. I love working with the students and watching them progress. When senior year arrived, college meetings began, and my counselor asked me what I wanted to do for a career, I didn't say Emperor of the World. Instead, I told him I wanted to become a board-certified behavior analyst. A BCBA helps develop learning plans for students with autism and other disabilities. Basically, I would get to do what I love for the rest of my life. He laughed and told me that it was a nice change that a seventeen-year-old knew so specifically what she wanted to do. I smiled, thanked him, and left. But it occurred to me that, while my desired occupation was decided, my true goal in life was still to become a Fixer-Upper. I'll do one thing during the day, then spend my off-hours helping people where I can. Instead of flying like Sue, though, I'll opt for a nice performance automobile. My childhood self would appreciate that. Bridget takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but her essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of her essay. Bridget starts each paragraph with a clear signpost of where we are in time: Paragraph 1: "after a long day in first grade" Paragraph 2: "in elementary school" Paragraph 3: "seven years down the road" Paragraph 4: "when I was a freshman in high school" Paragraph 5: "when senior year arrived" This keeps the reader oriented without being distracting or gimmicky. What makes this essay fun to read is that Bridget takes a child's idea of a world made better through quasi-magical helpers and turns it into a metaphor for the author's future aspirations. It helps that the metaphor is a very clear one: people who work with students with disabilities are making the world better one abstract fix at a time, just like imaginary Fixer-Uppers would make the world better one concrete physical fix at a time. Every childhood Fixer-Upper ever. Separate paragraphs in a consistent way, either by indenting each paragraph or by using block style, keeping all the words to the left margin but spacing extra between paragraphs. If there are a lot of mistakes in your essay, it can not be pretty. Make sure you have spelled everything correctly. Make sure your basic punctuation is correct. Did you separate dialogue correctly from the rest of your text? Did you use capitalization correctly? Check out our article on the most common mistakes in college essays for more tips to ensure your essay reads well. Approach the essay from a different angle If you look at things a little differently from others you stand out. In answering an essay prompt, you need not always do it the most normal way. What if you were to take the negative approach to answer the prompt? What are your hopes? Add links to articles and citations as you go so you can refer to them easily. Figure out what you want to say. You need to know before you begin. In order to make a point, you have to have one. Create a classic, canonical outline. Prune out anything irrelevant and organize your outline into the classic structure. Use that energy to write a draft. Leave out the evolution of your own approach and stick to the facts. Writing Yourself into a Corner — The introduction needs to be strong enough to stand on its own but also leave room for you to expand on thoughts throughout the paper. Be sure your statements leave room for more explanation later on. Step 3 - Plant the Hook There are several different ways you can hook your reader's interest when writing your introduction. Planting a hook at the beginning gives you a way to use a common narrative or return to your original ideas throughout the paper which can give the entire essay more flow as well as setting the stage for you to have a convenient way to bring it all together in the conclusion. Using a hook in the introduction simply refers to writing a sentence that captures the imagination and attention of the reader. Don't get too excited about working in reverse—not all activities are safe to do backwards. Once you've figured out your topic and zeroed in on the experience you want to highlight in the beginning of your essay, here are 2 great approaches to making it into a story: Talking it out, storyteller style while recording yourself : Imagine that you're sitting with a group of people at a campfire, or that you're stuck on a long flight sitting next to someone you want to befriend. Now tell that story. What details do you need to provide to put them in the story with you? What background information do they need in order to understand the stakes or importance of the story? Record yourself telling your story to friends and then chatting about it: What do they need clarified? What questions do they have? Do they want to know more, or less? Is part of your story interesting to them but not interesting to you? Later, as you listen to the recorded story to try to get a sense of how to write it, you can also get a sense of the tone with which you want to tell your story. Are you being funny as you talk? Trying to shock, surprise, or astound your audience? The way you most naturally tell your story is the way you should write it. After you've done this storyteller exercise, write down the salient points of what you learned. What is the story your essay will tell? What is the point about your life, point of view, or personality it will make? What tone will you tell it with? Sketch out a detailed outline so that you can start filling in the pieces as we work through how to write the introductory sections. Baron Munchausen didn't know whether to tell his story sad that his horse had been cut in half, or delighted by knowing what would happen if half a horse drank from a fountain. How to Write the First Sentence of Your College Essay In general, your essay's first sentence should be either a mini-cliffhanger that sets up a situation the reader would like to see resolved, or really lush scene-setting that situates your audience in a place and time they can readily visualize. The former builds expectations and evokes curiosity, and the latter stimulates the imagination and creates a connection with the author. In both cases, you hit your goal of greater reader engagement. This three-word sentence immediately sums up an enormous background of the personal and political. Wolf, my fourth-grade band teacher, as he lifted the heavy tuba and put it into my arms. It also does a little play on words: "handle it" can refer to both the literal tuba Matt is being asked to hold and the figurative stress of playing the instrument. I live alone—I always have since elementary school. Kevin Zevallos '16 for Connecticut College This opener definitely makes us want to know more. Why was he alone? Where were the protective grown-ups who surround most kids? How on earth could a little kid of years old survive on his own? What are "old" hands? Are they old-looking? How has having these hands affected the author?

But in that introduction I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. This means that before you can craft your ideal first sentence, the way the short story experience of your life will play out on the page, and the idea pivoting moment that transitions from your story to your insight, you must work out a general idea about which life essay you will share and what you expect that life event to demonstrate to the reader about you and the kind of person you are.

You've got your squirrel's attention. So what if our dining college table only has six chairs for seven people.

Books of College Essays If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include colleges of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers. College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful ideas, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles. Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider introduction of introductions, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay. Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked I've picked two essays from the examples collected college to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these ideas goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

What senses is the author describing. My college has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. I was lucky idea to discover what I am introduction about when I was a essay in high school. What does "discovering" ice entail.

Every childhood Fixer-Upper ever. Ask your parents to explain the back row to you. Technique 1: humor. Notice Bridget's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks her younger self's grand ambitions this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other. Technique 2: invented terminology. The second technique is the way Bridget coins her own terms, carrying them through the whole essay. It would be easy enough to simply describe the people she imagined in childhood as helpers or assistants, and to simply say that as a child she wanted to rule the world. Instead, she invents the capitalized and thus official-sounding titles "Fixer-Upper" and "Emperor of the World," making these childish conceits at once charming and iconic. What's also key is that the titles feed into the central metaphor of the essay, which keeps them from sounding like strange quirks that don't go anywhere. Technique 3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Bridget emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences. When she is narrating her childhood thought process, the sudden short sentence "It made perfect sense! Similarly, when the essay turns from her childhood imagination to her present-day aspirations, the turn is marked with "Or do they? The first time when the comparison between magical fixer-upper's and the future disability specialist is made is when Bridget turns her metaphor onto herself. The essay emphasizes the importance of the moment through repetition two sentences structured similarly, both starting with the word "maybe" and the use of a very short sentence: "Maybe it could be me. The last key moment that gets the small-sentence treatment is the emotional crux of the essay. As we watch Bridget go from nervously trying to help disabled students to falling in love with this specialty field, she undercuts the potential sappiness of the moment by relying on changed-up sentence length and slang: "Long story short, I got hooked. Bridget's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved. Explain the car connection better. The essay begins and ends with Bridget's enjoying a car ride, but this doesn't seem to be related either to the Fixer-Upper idea or to her passion for working with special-needs students. It would be great to either connect this into the essay more, or to take it out altogether and create more space for something else. Give more details about being a teacher in the Applied Behavior Analysis summer program. It makes perfect sense that Bridget doesn't want to put her students on display. It would take the focus off of her and possibly read as offensive or condescending. But, rather than saying "long story short," maybe she could elaborate on her own feelings here a bit more. What is it about this kind of teaching that she loves? What is she hoping to bring to the lives of her future clients? Want to write the perfect college application essay? Get professional help from PrepScholar. Your dedicated PrepScholar Admissions counselor will craft your perfect college essay, from the ground up. We'll learn your background and interests, brainstorm essay topics, and walk you through the essay drafting process, step-by-step. At the end, you'll have a unique essay that you'll proudly submit to your top choice colleges. Don't leave your college application to chance. Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively. Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye? Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill? Check out our article on the most common mistakes in college essays for more tips to ensure your essay reads well. Approach the essay from a different angle If you look at things a little differently from others you stand out. In answering an essay prompt, you need not always do it the most normal way. What if you were to take the negative approach to answer the prompt? What are your hopes? Maybe you can tell what your hopes are by writing what you do not hope for. Perhaps you can create a little mystery by not answering the prompt immediately. What to you want to study? Maybe you could reveal that in the last sentence of your prompt after telling about all the little things that have some relevance to your area of study. For example, you might describe many natural flora, observe fauna, then list feelings you have about nature to lead up to writing that you want to study biology. You might even bury your answer to a prompt in a story or in a moral tale or even in a description. Think of helper phrases such as "that was the moment I realized" and "never again would I. One was the lock on the door. I actually succeeded in springing it. Stephen '19 for Johns Hopkins University This is a pretty great pivot, neatly connecting the story Stephen's been telling about having to break into a car on a volunteering trip and his general reliance on his own resourcefulness and ability to roll with whatever life throws at him. It's a double bonus that he accomplishes the pivot with a play on the word "click," which here means both the literal clicking of the car door latch and the figurative clicking his brain does. Note also how the pivot crystallizes the moment of epiphany through the word "suddenly," which implies instant insight. But in that moment I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. When attempting to climb the mountain of comedic success, I didn't just fall and then continue on my journey, but I fell so many times that I befriended the ground and realized that the middle of the metaphorical mountain made for a better campsite. Not because I had let my failures get the best of me, but because I had learned to make the best of my failures. Rachel Schwartzbaum '19 for Connecticut College This pivot similarly focuses on a "that moment" of illuminated clarity. In this case, it broadens Rachel's experience of stage fright before her standup comedy sets to the way she has more generally not allowed failures to stop her progress—and has instead been able to use them as learning experiences. Not only does she describe her humor as "self-deprecating," but she also demonstrates what she means with that great "befriended the ground" line. It was on this first educational assignment that I realized how much could be accomplished through an animal education program—more, in some cases, than the aggregate efforts of all of the rehabilitators. I found that I had been naive in my assumption that most people knew as much about wildlife as I did, and that they shared my respect for animals. Maloney '07 for Hamilton College This is another classically constructed pivot, as J. The widening of scope happens at once as we go from a highly specific "first educational assignment" to the more general realization that "much" could be accomplished through these kinds of programs. Pivot Idea 2: Link the Described Experience With Others In this pivot, you draw a parallel between the life event that you've been describing in your very short story and other events that were similar in some significant way. My goal is to make all the ideas in my mind fit together like the gears of a Swiss watch. Whether it's learning a new concept in linear algebra, talking to someone about a programming problem, or simply zoning out while I read, there is always some part of my day that pushes me towards this place of cohesion: an idea that binds together some set of the unsolved mysteries in my mind. Aubrey Anderson '19 for Tufts University After cataloging and detailing the many interesting thoughts that flow through her brain in a specific hour, Aubrey uses the pivot to explain that this is what every waking hour is like for her "on a daily basis. And her pivot lets us know that her example is a demonstration of how her mind works generally. Our return brought so much back for me. I was scared that my love for the place would be tainted by his death, diminished without him there as my guide. That fear was part of what kept my mother and me away for so long. Once there, though, I was relieved to realize that Albuquerque still brings me closer to my father. The previously described trip after the father's death pivots into a sense of the continuity of memory. Even though he is no longer there to "guide," the author's love for the place itself remains. Pivot Idea 3: Extract and Underline a Trait or Value In this type of pivot, you use the experience you've described to demonstrate its importance in developing or zooming in on one key attribute. Here are some ways to think about making this transition: "I could not have done it without characteristic y, which has helped me through many other difficult moments," or "this is how I came to appreciate the importance of value z, both in myself and in those around me. I would never have invested so much time learning about the molecular structure or chemical balance of plants if not for taking care of him. Michaela '19 for Johns Hopkins University In this tongue-in-cheek essay in which Michaela writes about Stanley, a beloved cactus, as if "he" has human qualities and is her child, the pivot explains what makes this plant so meaningful to its owner. Without having to "take care of him," Michaela "would never have invested so much time learning" about plant biology. She has a deep affinity for the natural sciences and attributes her interest at least partly to her cactus. Prune out anything irrelevant and organize your outline into the classic structure. Use that energy to write a draft. The Parts of a College Essay Introduction Your intro tells your reader what to expect from your essay. Take a look at some of these opening lines from college entrance essays submitted to Stanford University. While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe? Some fathers might disapprove of their children handling noxious chemicals in the garage. I change my name each time I place an order at Starbucks. Although establishing your approach is important, be sure it sounds completely different than the question or assignment text. Mapping Your Thoughts — You may find the mental path you took while researching and writing your paper to be pretty thrilling — but your readers won't. Leave out the evolution of your own approach and stick to the facts. Writing Yourself into a Corner — The introduction needs to be strong enough to stand on its own but also leave room for you to expand on thoughts throughout the paper. Be sure your statements leave room for more explanation later on. Step 3 - Plant the Hook There are several different ways you can hook your reader's interest when writing your introduction.

Pivot Idea 2: Link the Described Experience With Others In this introduction, you introduction a parallel between the life event that you've been describing in your very short story and college events that were similar in some significant way. Conclusion In your essay, you wrap everything up in a essay idea.